Monday, August 4, 2008

This Love has got no ceiling !!!

Then I asked her “when I watched “Notebook” I remembered V, is this love?” she kept mum. Then sometime later I asked her “I feel good when V is around, is this love?” she kept mum. “I don’t LIKE any girl other than V, is this love?” She still kept mum. And now here I am, after 4-5 years of friendship. I care for her. I care for her relationship with some other guy. I am trying to save that. I am confident about her career, worried about her PG. I am watching her walking, holding his hands on their so-called-anniversary. I am watching her pretending like aishwarya from raincoat, trying to save block holes of their relations. I am realizing the respect for my emotions going down, down on low priority. I don’t remember what dress she wore, don’t remember her body, I didn’t feel anything :D , never had her in my wildest fantasies. I am seeing myself listening to their stories ,pretending to be interested and holding myself. Joking and creating irrelevant topics to make her speak. I am seeing myself wishing her on her birthday and their so-called-anniversary though she forgot mine. No ego, no masks, nothing!! Now I want to ask her “Is this Love?” For the first time I am confident. I know IT IS. I LOVE her. But don’t know whether she will keep mum as usual or …..

----trying to find the answer of the question 'NOT telling her the truth' i came across this..

This Love is beyond the study of theology,
that old trickery and hypocrisy.
If you want to improve your mind that way,

sleep on.

I've given up on my brain.
I've torn the cloth to shreds
and thrown it away.

If you're not completely naked,
wrap your beautiful robe of words
around you,

and sleep.

- rumi

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